Single Parenting Is One of the Hardest Things I Have Ever Done

Will it ever seem easy?

Photo by Guillaume de Germain on Unsplash

Single parenting is one of the hardest things I have ever done

I didn’t realize how difficult it was to be a single parent until I became one. I thought I was doing most of the parenting already so what would make it more difficult. I now laugh at my blissful ignorance.

Single parenting is not just about taking care of the kids. It’s about providing for all of their needs while fighting the guilt of not spending as much time with them as you would like. It’s all of the pressure you feel to get it right and not screw up your kids even more than not growing up in a two-parent household.

This weight can crush you. There are many days I just want to give up when everything seems too hard.

I worry about our future and if I will ever make it past basic survival.

We have to let go.

We can’t do everything, we don’t have all the answers, and we can’t make everything happen.

We don’t know what the future holds nor can we control it. Who knows what may happen tomorrow that makes all our stress and worry pointless.

None of this is under our control. We have to stop taking on all of the control of these things, everything.

When I’m trying to control everything I’m not living in the present. I can’t enjoy my life with my children.

Finding balance lets you live your life in strength.

How to find balance

Acknowledge your hard work. We have to look back and see how far we’ve come once in a while to realize how well we are doing.

Allow yourself to rest. Everyone needs a break sometimes. Give yourself permission to let everything go for a little while and come back refreshed and ready to go again.

Trust that things will work out in the end. We don’t know the ending to this story and never will until it’s over. Sometimes you just have to ride it out and see where this chapter ends.

Questions to ask

When we don’t acknowledge our accomplishments are we holding ourselves back from future progress? We need to be gentler with ourselves. More love, less pressure.

Should we be punishing our future selves because we didn’t reach a goal? Goals can change. We have to be willing to let things go when we realize the goal is no longer a good fit.

Remember your why

When I think of how difficult it is to take care of my children on my own I have to remember why I’m doing this. They are my why. A healthy, happy future for them is my dream. I will keep fighting my way forward to give them what they need to live well in this crazy world.

How is your single parenting going?



Julia Freeman, Trauma Recovery Coach in training

I believe survivors of narcissistic abuse and domestic violence deserve to live in freedom and peace.