Survivor’s Journal

Breaking the Trauma Response of Busyness

This one takes lots of time

Photo by Omid Armin on Unsplash

The Problem

I am a master at multi-tasking, or so I think. I’ve heard about the studies that prove we can’t actually do more than one thing at a time well and I’m beginning to believe this to be true.

I can’t watch a movie or tv show without doing something else at the same time. I can’t listen to a podcast unless I’m driving or folding laundry. I can’t just sit down and focus on breathing and being alive for more than a couple of minutes.

Why is it important to be able to stop the busyness? For one thing, busyness can be addicting. For another, we lose our ability to be present with others and ourselves when we are used to doing, doing, doing.

Is it really a problem and why? Yes, it is. We use being focused on everything but how we are doing as a way to avoid the trauma and recovery we need to work through. Why? Because it is hard work to heal. We will have to learn healthier behaviors and responses to what we are using as a band-aid to keep limping through life.

Healing is the difference between surviving and thriving.

One step in the journey is learning to breathe again. We need to learn to be at peace in our minds, hearts, and bodies to reclaim our lives as our own. I am tearing up as I write this because I still have a difficult time with “Peace, be still” in my life. It is painful to sit quietly with nothing to distract me and hear the thoughts that run through my mind and the feelings in my heart that clearly tell me that I have a lot of work left to do.

Journal exercise:

Sit with yourself for a little bit to see how it feels. After you have spent at least 5 minutes being quiet write out some of the thoughts that came to mind and how you felt.

Follow up with a message of gratitude about how far you have already come in your healing and a commitment to continue your journey to healing.

Take a few deep breaths and release any tension or icky emotions you may be holding.



Julia Freeman, Trauma Recovery Coach in training

I believe survivors of narcissistic abuse and domestic violence deserve to live in freedom and peace.